Bad Movies at Redbox: Watching the very worst Redbox has to offer so you don't have to

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

A Merry Friggin' Christmas

Movie Number Two in the Failed Experiment known as Bad Christmas Movies at Redbox...


Redbox Synopsis: Boyd and his family are forced to spend a dreaded Christmas at his parent's house with his eccentric father that he has been avoiding for years. When he realizes that he left his son's gifts at home, Boyd and his father must hit the road in a blizzard to retrieve the gifts before sunrise to save Christmas.(84 Minutes, Not Rated, No Captions)

A Merry Frigin' Christmas is the first film in the Bad Christmas Movies at Redbox series in which I review the direct to DVD films coming to Redbox plus some old Christmas favorites. This series is a bit different in that films are given a bit more leeway than the usual films on this site as they are Christmas themed films generally aimed at family entertainment.


And while the Hott Hottness award will still be given if warranted, I also rate the film on a Rewatchability Index to rate the chances of the film being a traditional Christmas movie.

We're two movies into this failed experiment and so far, this hasn't been going so well. Attempt number two below the fold

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

WWE Christmas Bounty

Up first in my failed experiment that is Bad Christmas Movies at Redbox that I am now seriously regretting, we have WWE Films/ABC Family Movie, Christmas Bounty...

Going by the poster, I'd guess the middle guy is a deranged serial killer these two track on Christmas Eve.

Redbox Synopsis: A former bounty hunter tries to keep her past a secret when her boyfriend visits for Christmas (72 Minutes, Not Rated, Captions)

WWE Christmas Bounty is the first film in the Bad Christmas Movies at Redbox series in which I review the direct to DVD films coming to Redbox plus some old Christmas movies as well. This series is a bit different in that films are given a bit more leeway than the usual films on this site as they are Christmas themed films generally aimed at family entertainment.

So far, I would guess I am only getting the first one this year...
And while the Hott Hottness award will still be given if warranted, I also rate the film on a Rewatchability Index to rate the chances of the film being a traditional Christmas movie.


 Enjoy it all after the jump:

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

Announcing Bad Christmas Movies at Redbox

Now that Halloween is over, it is time to pretend Thanksgiving doesn't exist and launch straight into the Christmas season. I finished my Christmas list and moved on to what I could give back to my readers
Oddly enough, numbers 1 and 2 have been the same since I was 11.

Taking a look ahead at the coming soon releases from Redbox, the usual fare of horror and scifi is lacking to say the least. Of the upcoming movies, only The Purge Anarchy and Arsonist will be reviewed. As far as that goes, the first Purge was rediculous and the Arsonist is a Lifetime movie staring Julie Benz.
The Purge: Anarchy: Purge Harder! Yippie Ka-Yah Mr. Purger!
How could the same purge happen to the same guy twice?

Why am I telling you this? Well fear not, you'll have Bad Movies at Redbox to get you through the holidays with my drunken review of Christmas movies. Though these movies are a little different than what you are used to on this site.
READ MORE BELOW:

Friday, October 31, 2014

Halloween Links

Have a Happy and Scary Halloween!
I have seen some twisted-shit reviewing movies on this site but this woman haunts my dreams
Happy Halloween everybody. I don't have a review this week. Redbox didn't have any horror this week save for Deliver Us From Evil, a title so original it has only been used 9 other times since 1977. In lieu of that, lets take a look at what our Hott Hottness Award Alums have been up to:

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

See No Evil 2

In the Land of the Blind, the One-Eyed Killer is King...
And let me tell ya something, Mr. McMahon, you'll pay for your sins, brother!

Redbox Synopsis: In this sequel to the 2006 horror film, Kane returns as Jacob Goodnight, a human killing machine who terrorizes a group of students.(Rated R, 90 minutes, English and Spanish captions)

Different format for this review, first an overall review of the film and of course, the Hott Hottness Award at the end. At since I did like the film, the usual spoilery, nit-picky stuff is at the very end. Enjoy.

Friday, October 17, 2014

The Mummy Resurrected

A Misunderstood Awkward Comedy
Redbox Movie Art

IMDB Movie Art*
 *What the hell is that at the top of the IMDB version? Did they want us to think this got a Blu-ray release? Did it get a release in HD DVD? Was this made in 2006?

Redbox Synopsis: A group of archaeologists uncover a long lost pyramid in the middle of the Egyptian desert. Believing the pyramid to be full of ancient treasures, the group decides to explore. Little do they know that their actions are about to awaken an ancient evil. (Not Rated, 84 minutes, Closed Captions)

 A long winded setup, some cool screenshots, my odd dissection of this mess and finally, what you probably came her for in the first place, The Hott Hottness Award.

Disaster LA

A Zombie film by people who've never seen a zombie film, featuring characters that haven't seen a zombie film for people who love zombie films!
So no sequel, then?


Redbox Synopsis: Zombies run amuck (sic) in Los Angeles and a small group of survivors plans to vacate the city by heading to the coast before it's too late. (Not Rated, 83 minutes, closed captions)

Little different type of post today. I'm going to ramble on about zombie movies in general here, then the review and Hott Hottness Award (spoiler: she's worth it!) after the jump.

Friday, October 10, 2014

The Midnight Game

There's a snag in my plotline, Dear Midnight, Dear Midnight...
These back tats are getting out of control

Redbox Synopsis: A partying teen and her friends decide to perform an ancient pagan ritual found online called 'The Midnight Game': Candles are lit. A drop of blood is spilled. Their worst fears are confessed and an entity is summoned. But if the rules are not followed exactly, punishment is promised. Tonight, the game is not being taken seriously. A demonic horror has been unleashed. And now, even daylight cannot stop the nightmares that may destroy them all. (Rated R, 74 minutes, Captions)

Little change of pace today. I wrote most of a legit review (or what passes for a legit review around here) and overall recommendation first and then the fun stuff, spoilers, nitpicky crap I found, The Hott Hotness Award and at the end, I play the Midnight Game. If you don't want spoilers read the first part and stop, if you came to look at hott girls and my bizarre dimensia, skip to the end. Or do whatever you want. Live your life, I'm not your mother.

Fun starts below the jump

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